04/30/11 - 50 days without sale
Did 13 hours yesterday.
Got out of the office at 1700hrs.
Then did booth work from 2200 - 0230 the next day.
The 5 hours in between was to prepare.
Spent most of today in bed recovering and watching Starcraft.
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Day 48: Nothing Really Happens Here
04/28/11 - 48 days without sale
0653hrs. The boss called for a meeting at 0900hrs. Probably going to talk to us about how we are always late or never clock in at the end of the day.
0937hrs. Meeting time. Yeah. Fucked. Like Mario says, here we go.
And after the meeting, nothing really happened.
So here's nothing.
Yep.
Nothing.
I want pizza.
2103hrs. Big boss called for a meeting at 0900hrs tomorrow.
Poop.
0937hrs. Meeting time. Yeah. Fucked. Like Mario says, here we go.
And after the meeting, nothing really happened.
So here's nothing.
Yep.
Nothing.
I want pizza.
2103hrs. Big boss called for a meeting at 0900hrs tomorrow.
Poop.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Day 47: Same Shit, Brand New Day
04/27/11 - 47 days without sale
0816hrs. Welcome back to the workplace, I tell myself after the smashing un-success that was project undisclosed project project in a Muslim country somewhere in the world.
I'm Late.
I feel my job security slowly slipping away being one of the few people in this place with no sale after a month.
0921hrs. Followed up some of the people that inquired earlier this month.
Also working on the deal with the Russians and hopefully getting to make contact with the Japanese.
Then the Koreans.
Then the universe.
Yep, I'm a regular citizen of the world, aren't I?
1126hrs. With the advent of the global economy and the proliferation of the internet, the scope and means of the modern salesperson with a strong international background ought to be massively massive. Like WoW, only in 3D.
We're meant to capitalize on web 2.0 and the benefits one can derive from the metaphorically smaller world.
I'm still broke as shit.
Lunch time.
1432hrs. Got the briefing for a new mission. Operation wild mangosteen plantation steal. Trust me, this would be funnier if I could explain it.
But at the risk of risking the integrity of (insert name of reputable development company here at your convenience), all I can say is that this involves a condo and some wild mangosteen.
Sounds like a party.
1804hrs. After the whole fiasco from yesterday (link here), I've been slowly losing interest in the work that I do. I'm second guessing myself. I hate doing that.
Maybe things will get better if I fight for the aforementioned sale and end up winning.
In theory, I guess I still love what I do but when it comes down to practice, is this a hazard of the job?
I guess so.
Chin up.
Where does #0019 end and I begin?
Is this my slow descent into insanity?
You get to see it unfold on the blog.
Lucky you.
 |
| Borrowed from www.theblogofrecord.com |
I'm Late.
I feel my job security slowly slipping away being one of the few people in this place with no sale after a month.
0921hrs. Followed up some of the people that inquired earlier this month.
Also working on the deal with the Russians and hopefully getting to make contact with the Japanese.
Then the Koreans.
Then the universe.
Yep, I'm a regular citizen of the world, aren't I?
1126hrs. With the advent of the global economy and the proliferation of the internet, the scope and means of the modern salesperson with a strong international background ought to be massively massive. Like WoW, only in 3D.
We're meant to capitalize on web 2.0 and the benefits one can derive from the metaphorically smaller world.
I'm still broke as shit.
Lunch time.
1432hrs. Got the briefing for a new mission. Operation wild mangosteen plantation steal. Trust me, this would be funnier if I could explain it.
But at the risk of risking the integrity of (insert name of reputable development company here at your convenience), all I can say is that this involves a condo and some wild mangosteen.
Sounds like a party.
1804hrs. After the whole fiasco from yesterday (link here), I've been slowly losing interest in the work that I do. I'm second guessing myself. I hate doing that.
Maybe things will get better if I fight for the aforementioned sale and end up winning.
In theory, I guess I still love what I do but when it comes down to practice, is this a hazard of the job?
I guess so.
Chin up.
Where does #0019 end and I begin?
Is this my slow descent into insanity?
You get to see it unfold on the blog.
Lucky you.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Day 46: Something Completely Different
 |
| Here's how sales works. |
Instead of complaining about the tremendous amount of fail in project undisclosed project project, something completely different.
Sales is about establishing, building, and maintaining relationships.
A few days ago, I got a call from a good friend of mine from college. He was in a lower batch. From the same hometown studying in the big city. He ended up running in the same crowd that I did so I made it part of my personal mission to make sure he didn't do anything too stupid while away from home.
I consider my group of friends from college pretty tight and he's an integral part of that group.
Hell, I wrote and recorded an entire album for them as a Christmas present. His song was track 11.
He told me that his parents were interested in an investment in a condo or two. So I asked when they would like to head over to the showroom.
He told me that they wanted me over for breakfast the next day, to which I gladly obliged.
The breakfast went really well.
"My son here convinced me to take you as our broker," the dad said.
Sales is about establishing, building, and maintaining relationships.
I did my presentation, talked them through some of the available financing schemes, and gave them an overview of the available discounts that I can give. They seemed really interested and requested for sample computations.
At the end of it, I got them to validate a little piece of paper saying that I would be the person to handle the sale, should they decide to purchase from us.
After the presentation, I went to the office and started preparing sample computations to send over. When that was done, I printed them out and personally made the delivery to their house, leaving them with their son.
Sales is about establishing, building, and maintaining relationships.
On my way home, I got a call from the other team leader telling me that the account should belong to their team. One of them did, after all, entertain the family as walk in clients the day before. They also signed the little form noting the other team's service, thus acknowledging that they should be the rightful recipients of the sale.
Because of a little piece of paper signed a day before, the other team is telling me to back off from making the sale to the family of a guy I spent a good number of years of my life taking care of.
If this were any other client, I would have let it pass but I've invested too much of myself in my friendship with their son to even consider not giving them the best goddamed service and buying experience that I can offer.
Sales is about establishing, building, and maintaining relationships.
If the company rules that in sales, a little piece of paper trumps years of friendship, here's my resignation.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Day 37
04/12/11 - 37 days without sale
Maintaining strict radio silence as required by project undisclosed project project.
You didn't hear that from me.
What's that?
You didn't hear what from whom?
Nobody?
Good.
Maintaining strict radio silence as required by project undisclosed project project.
You didn't hear that from me.
What's that?
You didn't hear what from whom?
Nobody?
Good.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Day 34
04/09/11 - 34 days without sale
1229hrs. I get to go into the trenches at 1500hrs today. More sleep.
1518hrs. At the showroom. Open house today. This means a lot of brokers and agents and the such. We mere in-house people don't stand a chance.
2029hrs. I was just given a briefing by the sales head on project undisclosed project. For a briefing, it was pretty long. So much paperwork to be taken into consideration. A checklist for this, a checklist for that, and a checklist to make sure the checklists have been checked. For an undisclosed project project, there's an awful lot being told to me.
Apparently, I have to close a fuckshitload of deals. Or else.
That's all I can say.
When the classified is declassified, I will disclose the undesclosed to you, dear reader.
2118hrs. I think I can sneak out of the office.
2119hrs. Shhh.
2200hrs. Project undisclosed project is a go. T-minus 4 days.
I sound so pro.
 |
| Walking in |
1518hrs. At the showroom. Open house today. This means a lot of brokers and agents and the such. We mere in-house people don't stand a chance.
2029hrs. I was just given a briefing by the sales head on project undisclosed project. For a briefing, it was pretty long. So much paperwork to be taken into consideration. A checklist for this, a checklist for that, and a checklist to make sure the checklists have been checked. For an undisclosed project project, there's an awful lot being told to me.
Apparently, I have to close a fuckshitload of deals. Or else.
That's all I can say.
When the classified is declassified, I will disclose the undesclosed to you, dear reader.
2118hrs. I think I can sneak out of the office.
2119hrs. Shhh.
2200hrs. Project undisclosed project is a go. T-minus 4 days.
I sound so pro.
Friday, April 8, 2011
Day 33
04/08/11 - 33 days without sale.
0724hrs. Not feeling too well. But I have to prepare for negotiations with the Russians.
I think I may have said too much.
1814hrs. Yeah. Kinda sick. My stomach.
I think I may have said too much.
 |
| Pop culture reference! |
I think I may have said too much.
1814hrs. Yeah. Kinda sick. My stomach.
I think I may have said too much.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Day 32
04/07/11 - 32 days without sale
So it looks pro, I encourage everybody to abbreviate this blog to TVLH.
0914hrs. Team lead still hasn't arrived yet. I'm inspired to work.
I have no idea what we're going to do today. Probably field.
I received an email from big boss battle regarding a mission in an undisclosed place slated for an undisclosed time with an undisclosed number of operatives operating in the undisclosed operation.
I'm being considered for and undisclosed position in the undisclosed operation because of my undisclosed wealth of undisclosed knowledge of the undisclosed location that they refuse to disclose.
All I know is that it doesn't involve the Russians.
I think I may have said too much.
Buy air now and get a condo for free! (in two or so years)
1124hrs. So. Hungry. Yeah. Let's have lunch. Lunch is good.
1326hrs. Meeting with undisclosed party (is it the Russians or big boss battle? The plot thickens.)
1638hrs. Just got back from the meeting.
Team got into trouble because a client wasn't entertained properly. I wasn't there at the time but I'm still somehow involved. That's the way shit goes down in the real world apparently. If I were there, I would have entertained the shit out of that orphan. A song and dance number with fireworks and acrobatic contortionist elephants. I would have done that. Really.
1730hrs. Home. Coffee. Starcraft. Congratulations to Moletrap for his GSL gig.
Waiting for Nuke the Stars to release another video.
1800hrs. Sample computation time. As a sales person, one needs to know the numbers like nothing else. Its what everybody asks. I'd like to think I have it down. The numbers. Damn the numbers.
*cringe*
My laptop is my weapon and Microsoft Office is my ammo.
1825hrs. So numb. Nothing witty to say.
Ten points to anyone that says something funny.
Until next time.
Excelsior.
 |
| Golden Boys |
0914hrs. Team lead still hasn't arrived yet. I'm inspired to work.
I have no idea what we're going to do today. Probably field.
I received an email from big boss battle regarding a mission in an undisclosed place slated for an undisclosed time with an undisclosed number of operatives operating in the undisclosed operation.
I'm being considered for and undisclosed position in the undisclosed operation because of my undisclosed wealth of undisclosed knowledge of the undisclosed location that they refuse to disclose.
All I know is that it doesn't involve the Russians.
I think I may have said too much.
Buy air now and get a condo for free! (in two or so years)
1124hrs. So. Hungry. Yeah. Let's have lunch. Lunch is good.
1326hrs. Meeting with undisclosed party (is it the Russians or big boss battle? The plot thickens.)
1638hrs. Just got back from the meeting.
Team got into trouble because a client wasn't entertained properly. I wasn't there at the time but I'm still somehow involved. That's the way shit goes down in the real world apparently. If I were there, I would have entertained the shit out of that orphan. A song and dance number with fireworks and acrobatic contortionist elephants. I would have done that. Really.
1730hrs. Home. Coffee. Starcraft. Congratulations to Moletrap for his GSL gig.
Waiting for Nuke the Stars to release another video.
1800hrs. Sample computation time. As a sales person, one needs to know the numbers like nothing else. Its what everybody asks. I'd like to think I have it down. The numbers. Damn the numbers.
*cringe*
My laptop is my weapon and Microsoft Office is my ammo.
1825hrs. So numb. Nothing witty to say.
Ten points to anyone that says something funny.
Until next time.
Excelsior.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Day 31
05/06/11 - 31 days without sale
0702hrs. Our team lead sent us an email saying that we all have to meet this morning. Apparently, there are "issues to be discussed". I hate it when people say that kind of thing.
Today marks the 31st day I joined up fighting this pointless battle.
I feel like Alan Alda. 10 points to anyone that gets the reference.
1029hrs. Morning briefing just ended. The issues discussed are about who gets credit and commission for the sales that come in given some of the things that went down yesterday. In this business, I guess ground rules really do have to be laid down. Especially if there's more than one team in competition.
Not that any of it really applies to little old sale-less me.
In the field again today. Which means I'm gonna keep on getting a steady stream of nos and get the fuck away from mes. I'll get used to constant rejection.
I promise.
Do you accept the promise? (Think of your answer very carefully).
1321hrs. Just met with some Russians.
I think I may have said too much.
2034hrs. The computer is being slow. I'd write out a lot more but even my trusty computer thinks sales people aren't worth the time.
Fuck you technology.
Fuck you.
2054hrs. I hope this manages to get posted and the world will be able to read my story.
 |
| Russian soldiers in Hungary Courtesy of UCLA |
Today marks the 31st day I joined up fighting this pointless battle.
I feel like Alan Alda. 10 points to anyone that gets the reference.
1029hrs. Morning briefing just ended. The issues discussed are about who gets credit and commission for the sales that come in given some of the things that went down yesterday. In this business, I guess ground rules really do have to be laid down. Especially if there's more than one team in competition.
Not that any of it really applies to little old sale-less me.
In the field again today. Which means I'm gonna keep on getting a steady stream of nos and get the fuck away from mes. I'll get used to constant rejection.
I promise.
Do you accept the promise? (Think of your answer very carefully).
1321hrs. Just met with some Russians.
I think I may have said too much.
2034hrs. The computer is being slow. I'd write out a lot more but even my trusty computer thinks sales people aren't worth the time.
Fuck you technology.
Fuck you.
2054hrs. I hope this manages to get posted and the world will be able to read my story.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Day 30
04/05/11 - 30 days without sale
0714hrs. There is an event today for the sellers of (insert name of reputable development company here at your convenience). Not looking forward to that.
Not looking forward to to that boring affair at all.
I'll say I have a client meeting and disappear.
Shoutout to the fine men and women holding the front in Singapore. How is it there? Has there really been an increase of 3-5% in rentals this first quarter of 2011?
1543hrs. I actually have to be there for the event.
Fuck.
Stepped into the office. All the action is going on here. There is dissent in the ranks. Another turf war as to who gets the commissions and credit for the sale.
I shouldn't be listening in but the back and forth is fascinating. They're saying the same things over and over and over again.
"I assisted"
"But I followed up"
"But I assisted"
"But I followed up"
"But I assisted"
"But I followed up"
"But I assisted"
ad infinitum.
Scrap that. Its pretty boring as well.
1712hrs. The goddamned thing is finally over (both the event and the little skirmish in the office).
1700hrs. Why did I enlist again?
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?
*Pumps fist in the air*
The neighbors are looking at me funny.
I blush.
 |
| To counteract the boredom, a picture with landscape dimensions |
0714hrs. There is an event today for the sellers of (insert name of reputable development company here at your convenience). Not looking forward to that.
Not looking forward to to that boring affair at all.
I'll say I have a client meeting and disappear.
Shoutout to the fine men and women holding the front in Singapore. How is it there? Has there really been an increase of 3-5% in rentals this first quarter of 2011?
1543hrs. I actually have to be there for the event.
Fuck.
Stepped into the office. All the action is going on here. There is dissent in the ranks. Another turf war as to who gets the commissions and credit for the sale.
I shouldn't be listening in but the back and forth is fascinating. They're saying the same things over and over and over again.
"I assisted"
"But I followed up"
"But I assisted"
"But I followed up"
"But I assisted"
"But I followed up"
"But I assisted"
ad infinitum.
Scrap that. Its pretty boring as well.
1712hrs. The goddamned thing is finally over (both the event and the little skirmish in the office).
1700hrs. Why did I enlist again?
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?
*Pumps fist in the air*
The neighbors are looking at me funny.
I blush.
Monday, April 4, 2011
Day 29
04/04/11 - 29 days without sale
0729hrs. To those who play starcraft, coffee is a stim pack. Two shots. I'm so pumped. Let's go. We can do this. Make that sale.
0850hrs. Our sales head came in from the head office. So fucked. So so fucked. There goes the pumped-ness.
0915hrs. Meeting with the big boss battle guy. So so so fucked.
1013hrs. I need to talk to 200 prospects to close 1 sale. So so so so fucked. Apparently I lack confidence.
So now I'm pissed off. I want to punch a cow.
Sales head is pissed is region head gets the shit.
Region head passes the shit to the team lead.
Team lead passes the shit to us.
Mom is pissed at the iphone 4 so I get the shit.
Dad is pissed on the road so I get the shit.
My girlfriend is pissed so I get the shit.
2118hrs. Off to find a cow.
 | |
| Douglas MacArthur Biggest boss ever knowledgerush.com |
0850hrs. Our sales head came in from the head office. So fucked. So so fucked. There goes the pumped-ness.
0915hrs. Meeting with the big boss battle guy. So so so fucked.
1013hrs. I need to talk to 200 prospects to close 1 sale. So so so so fucked. Apparently I lack confidence.
So now I'm pissed off. I want to punch a cow.
Sales head is pissed is region head gets the shit.
Region head passes the shit to the team lead.
Team lead passes the shit to us.
Mom is pissed at the iphone 4 so I get the shit.
Dad is pissed on the road so I get the shit.
My girlfriend is pissed so I get the shit.
2118hrs. Off to find a cow.
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Day 28
04/03/11 - 28 days later
I am a zombie.
Hear me groan.
I will now dub day 27 the lost day.
Day 27 is the lost day.
Nobody will know what happened then. It will be lost to time and the world will have to go on living not knowing what happened on #0019's 27th day with the company.
But nobody really gives a shit, right?
1155hrs. Sunday is rest day but some members of the team were assigned to be in the showroom today. Pushy new guy tried to get me to cover for him. On a Sunday.
No.
My Sunday is mine.
Because the whole sales thing hasn't been going my way as of late, something completely different.
1927hrs. My little workstation at home has a view of some of the other houses in our area and when I have downtime, I look at the neighbors in the houses across the street. Very "Rear Window", I know.
Anyway, this rich Korean family lives across the street and one of their daughters or nieces or whatever came to the country to learn how to speak English. Now it looks like she's fallen in love with the gardener, who I was able to gether from asking around, has a girlfriend he's living in with somewhere. Weird considering she fell in love with the last gardener they hired (he was fired because her parents didn't like the idea. And yes, he also had a girlfriend with whom he shared a living space with).
I should sell that girl a condo. She might be able to use it.
More details on that as they come.
Still no sale.
 |
| Lego Zombies! Taken from appius95's photostream Click the photo to see his Flickr. |
I am a zombie.
Hear me groan.
I will now dub day 27 the lost day.
Day 27 is the lost day.
Nobody will know what happened then. It will be lost to time and the world will have to go on living not knowing what happened on #0019's 27th day with the company.
But nobody really gives a shit, right?
1155hrs. Sunday is rest day but some members of the team were assigned to be in the showroom today. Pushy new guy tried to get me to cover for him. On a Sunday.
No.
My Sunday is mine.
Because the whole sales thing hasn't been going my way as of late, something completely different.
1927hrs. My little workstation at home has a view of some of the other houses in our area and when I have downtime, I look at the neighbors in the houses across the street. Very "Rear Window", I know.
Anyway, this rich Korean family lives across the street and one of their daughters or nieces or whatever came to the country to learn how to speak English. Now it looks like she's fallen in love with the gardener, who I was able to gether from asking around, has a girlfriend he's living in with somewhere. Weird considering she fell in love with the last gardener they hired (he was fired because her parents didn't like the idea. And yes, he also had a girlfriend with whom he shared a living space with).
I should sell that girl a condo. She might be able to use it.
More details on that as they come.
Still no sale.
Friday, April 1, 2011
Day 26
04/01/11 - 0 days without sale
SALE!
FUCK YEAH!
FAME AND FUCKING FORTUNE HERE I COME!
April fools.
I'm still broke as shit.
You probably saw that coming.
Let's start again.
04/01/11 - 26 days without sale
Stuck at the showroom until 2200hrs.
Fuck.
I apoogize wholeheartedly and unreservedly for having resorted to foul language and an April fools joke at an (arguably feeble) attempt at humour.
 |
| Wall Street after the end of WW2 |
FUCK YEAH!
FAME AND FUCKING FORTUNE HERE I COME!
April fools.
I'm still broke as shit.
You probably saw that coming.
Let's start again.
04/01/11 - 26 days without sale
Stuck at the showroom until 2200hrs.
Fuck.
I apoogize wholeheartedly and unreservedly for having resorted to foul language and an April fools joke at an (arguably feeble) attempt at humour.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)